The Gift of Writing
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
“The plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of His heart through all generations.” Psalm 33:11
Ever since I was a little girl, I always loved to write. I'd walk around scribbling furiously in my notebook and always bearing the writer's mark of ink stained fingers. I also loved to read, and it was my love of stories that fueled my desire to write. They went hand in hand, complementing and completing each other. Reading and writing increased my understanding of language, exposed me to different cultures and ideas, increased my empathy, fascination for exploring new places, my love for people, and my imagination. If it were not for reading and writing, I would never have learned to release the things inside me or been shaped into the person I am today. What is my point in sharing all of this with you?
When I look back, I see God's presence all throughout the book of my life. Every chapter, every sentence, every moment- He was there. When I was lost, when I was broken, when I was confused, when I was scared, He was there. The Author of life never left His characters but was an active participant as we filled pages and pages together. When I reflect, I realize God grew certain traits in my personality and put certain things in my path for a reason. I always wanted to write. Where did that desire come from? How did I know with such conviction that I would be a writer one day?
When I graduated college, I was obsessed with following my dreams. I didn't know how I would get there or focus too much on the details, but somehow, I just would. This was followed by a lot of pain, self-exploration, conviction, and a rude awakening. I was praying to God, crying out to Him, and talking to Him consistently, but I wasn't listening. You see, I always thought it was about my dream. In reality, it was about what God's plan was for me and how the desire He placed in my heart was meant to fulfill His dream, not mine. I was so consumed with my (self), my purpose, my writing (do you see a similar thread here? Me me me), that I didn't leave any room for God to direct me. He had placed a calling on my life, but I was too focused on the self to let Him lead me into that predestined and carefully designed calling.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart.” Jeremiah 1:5
When I gave my life to Christ again for the third time in my life, I decided to follow Him boldly and completely this time. I decided it would not be simply a checkbox Christian under a question of religion, but I wanted Him to inhabit every part of my life. He never abandoned me. I could cry simply writing that line because He and I have been through so much together. God gave me the dreams in my heart because they were always His dreams for me to begin with. I just didn't understand it at the time. He gave me this love for stories and understanding of language because He knew one day it would help me read the beautiful words of the Bible. He gave me this desire to investigate because He knew it would heighten my desire to know the Word, to seek Him. He gave me the urge to write because He knew one day, I would use it for His glory and I would bring people to Him through it. He gave me the perseverance to not give up because He knew one day, I would publish articles, blogs, and poems that spoke about Him. It was the same dream; it just wasn't how I'd pictured it. When I aligned my will with His, when I rested it all in His hands, I understood there was something worth learning in the slow unfolding of my growing skill. Faith is a muscle. We have to exercise it for it to get stronger. Our gifts given to us by God are the same. We must keep trying in order to grow, we must keep persevering in order to reach our potential. It is a process and often a slow one. Do what you can with what you have and give the rest to God.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6
My point? Don't let your dreams consume you, but rather let God consume them. Give them to Him. God gave you your talents and your dreams for a purpose, but they are for His purpose. They are to honor and praise Him. They are to draw others close to Him. They are to spread goodness in a sinful, drowning world. Let them be actions of praise and methods of worship. You can never live your life for culture or the world and expect God to align to your perception, but rather align yourself to His. Use it for His glory, not yours. When you stop fighting, that's when the miracle happens. I'm not talking about a magical situation where you get everything you've ever desired. I'm talking about the change in your heart. God is asking, do you love me? Most importantly, stemming from that love we claim to have, He asks, Do you love me enough to let it go? Can you give all your earthly possessions, ideas, perceptions of how you wanted things to go, dreams, etc., back to Him?
There’s a story in the book of Mark of a man who asks Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life (Mark 10:17-22). The man lives by the rules and follows all the commandments. Jesus tells him despite this, he must give up all his belongings to the poor and follow Him. The man goes away sad because he was a very rich man and couldn’t bear to part with his physical belongings. He couldn’t let it go. Jesus than says that it is easier for a camel to go through the needle of an eye than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of God (Mark 10:25). He is talking about the state of this man’s heart and mentality because the man values his earthly possessions above following God. I think many of us are like that man. We just can’t let go of all the things we desire and physically hold. We can’t let go of the idea/picture we have in our minds of how we want things to go. Here’s the thing though, life is unpredictable! Things will rarely, if ever, go the way you planned. When the astonished disciples asked, “Then who can be saved?” Jesus replied, “With man it is impossible, but all things are possible with God.” (Mark 10:26-27). Dear reader, you must know what God has planned for you is so much richer than anything you could ever possibly imagine for yourself. All things are possible with Him.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:11-12.
Often, our problem is that we think God is taking too long to fulfill the picture we have in our minds of how things should go and so we try to rush the process, catapulting into our own misery. The problem in our fast food culture today is that we want everything now. We desire convenience over patience and hard work. You don't give yourself a chance for God to teach you or grow you if you can't sit still long enough for the seed of your mind to settle onto solid dirt. That person then continues the cycle of uprooting, never taking root, never growing, never blooming spiritually. In this society, everyone is "grinding", chasing clout, dressing up their life with an insta-perfect appearance, so much that they never have time to be real or to learn. That kind of lifestyle leads to questions of self-worth, comparison, anxiety, depression, etc., and ultimately to unhappiness. You cannot be full chasing what always leaves you hungry and when you live for the world, you will always be starving. Don't focus so much on who you will be, focus on who you will let lead. When you give it to God, everything else falls into place. Maybe not the way you expected, maybe not right away, maybe not the way you planned, but it will bring you more joy than you would have chasing the wind (Ecclesiastes 1:14). God has so much better in store for you than you could ever create for yourself on your own and His timing is perfect.
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.” Psalm 32:8
Matthew 23:12 says, "Those who exalt themselves will be humbled and those who humble themselves will be exalted." Isn't it about time we changed the posture of our hearts from pride and worry to gratitude and peace? Like the old hymn says, turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look up. Focus on things above. God is with you, but are you with Him? Do you truly trust Him? Readers, I pray you will reflect over those questions today and if they convict you, I pray you ponder why. I pray God's peace will flood the struggle in your heart. I pray you will step into the calling He has placed upon your life and let Him lead. I pray you give God back everything He gave you so that He may increase it. I pray that you be still, seek Him, and trust Him.
"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." Exodus 14:14
